The cider is gone. My fridge is empty. I'm clean. Yeah, feeling pretty good about it. I've been weaning myself gradually, and by the time I got to the bottom of the last jug, last night, I was ready to kiss the addiction good-bye. The apple was off my back.
Now that I look back on the crazy month-long adventure, I see that it was not so much an addiction as an infatuation. There's a teary needy high-school quality about the whole affair (even the choice of word gives me away) that reminds me of the way I felt about a girl named Valerie in ninth grade. Ah, Valerie. Her hair was long and straight. She wore horn rims, and loafers with tassels. Her voice floats like whipped cream on the hot chocolate of my memory. I think her dad was a minister or something, and ... she was in love with someone else. George, his name was. I used to plan out ways to kill him. (Kidding, kidding. Actually, he was a nice guy. I think he's in insurance now.)
So like I say this cider thing is behind me now. I'm back on coffee, where I belong. Speaking of which, doesn't that guy in the picture scare you? I think there's a real creepy quality about him. Nowadays we drink coffee in coffee shops, before going to work. Back in the 50s you drank coffee at home before killing your wife. (Gee, there's a lot of violence to explain away in my brackets today. I must be going through something. Let me check ... no red circle on the calendar. I dunno what it is.)
F12 for me now. See you guys tomorrow.
10 comments:
That guy in the picture is grinning because he's drinking
apple cider flavoured coffee.
Now do you feel your addiction returning?
The guy in the picture is present-day George. He's eyeballing you as you wean yourself from the cider. He's thinking "I got your little pretty & now I'll ship him a granny smith just to watch him squirm"......
Susan
Guys, guys ... once someone confesses to an addiction you are supposed to be supportive. Don't you watch Oprah? Cut me some slack. I'm over it, but it still hurts, you know? You guys shouldn't be making fun here.
RS
Cider - pfft. That's just a gateway drink. Now I have me here some fabulous energy drinks that provide the caffeine without the hassle of brewing the coffee. I could always send you some...you know, the first one is always free...
Carol
But will it increase my sexual potency? Everything else on the market makes this claim. And gateway to what? RS
Of course it will increase your sexual potency! And make you look 10 years younger, 5 inches taller and eliminate those pesky gray hairs! It's a gateway to the harder stuff, so if you wind up in rehab for energy drink abuse I can't be responsible, Britney, (uh, I mean Richard).
Carol
Vade retro, satanas!
RS
C'mon, you know you wanna...Ipse venena bibas!
Hi Mr. Scrimger,
I just finished reading, "From Charlie's Point of View" for my Diverse Adolescent Literature class and just wanted to send some kudos your way. Thank you for helping to represent an underrepresented group in the adolescent novel world. I will definitely be adding "From Charlie's POV" to my library in my future classroom. Thanks for the inspirational, humorous and "eye-opening" read! I really think adolescents will be able to learn form the novel as well as be able to relate to it on many pre-pubescent-tweenie-angst levels...
Because there are some inappropiate (well, rude) folks out there, the blogger software always asks if you want to publish a comment. Your comment, Catie, I would want to PROCLAIM. Thanks a bunch. RS
Post a Comment