Thursday, 17 June 2010

dirty me

I feel dirty. Nothing to do with any kind of bodily abuse -- food, sex, drugs, exercise. This is a soul kind of stain. For the last few month or so, reviews have been coming in for the new book. I do not read reviews when they arrive. I compile a file and ignore it. But I can not ignore it any longer. My blog guy and publishers say I have to put the reviews on the website. This website.

So for most of today I have been forcing myself to read about myself. On and on and more and more, and all about me. Talk about your wankfest.

I hate bad reviews. Whether they are smartly or stupidly written, whether they make a good point or persistently miss the point I am trying to make, I hate 'em. Reviews that begin, Scrimger's disappointing new book ... or Until now I have always enjoyed Scrimger's sense of humour ... or I can not understand how Scrimger ... Yuck. I want to take these critics and throw them, collectively, off of a high place so that they land on something sharp.

But, see, I don't really like good reviews either. Scrimger is wonderful ... I think Scrimger is the best writer now .... Scrimger's brilliance is unmistakable ... (actually there aren't any reviews that begin this way, but you get what I mean). These reviews are not AS bad as the stinkers, but they are still kind of cringe-making to read.

Well, it's over now. Bleah. I have combed through the file, picked out the interesting and positive bits, and put them on the Me & Death page. Maybe I should give you guys -- you blog readers -- the real deal, and include the sentences that were not so positive. Maybe I will, at that. But not now. It's been a long dirty day. I'll have a bath in a moment, and feel cleaner.


Anonymous said...

Don't feel bad--I just cleaned a toilet. Like reading critiques, good and bad, we all get around to it at some point. I hope!

The guy in the pic looks like he forgot to wash his palms after slathering himself with tanning lotion. Funny.

Is it you? You did say you'd gotten yourself in bathing suit shape. But you also said you'd learned to wash your hands. :)


p.s. Prepare to cringe. I smiled lots reading Me and Death.

Richard Scrimger said...

Aww, thanks. I hope you were laughing at the funny bits.

Anonymous said...

Probably! But then my sense of humour is pretty whacky.

I thought it would be good reader's theatre, like Lost World. I enjoyed that on radio once--I think on CBC. The sound effects were lots of fun.